Oral Rehydration Salts


You Know You''re an UltraLady If...

by Various Authors


  1. Your favorite piece of jewelry is your running watch.

  2. You have a walk-in closet dedicated to running apparel.

  3. You have a permanent tan in the outline of a jogbra.

  4. You have the complete collection of every “long lasting” lip color ever made.

  5. You have a trail shoe collection that would make Imelda Marcos envious.

  6. As an infant, you were dropped on your head.

  7. You don''t need to paint your toenails... they''re already different colors.

  8. You buy economy-size Vaseline on a regular basis.

  9. You wear high heels only to relieve your achilles tendonitis.

  10. You wear running clothes to work so you''re prepared for after work.

  11. Peeing in the toilet seems unnatural.

  12. You walk up the stairs and run down them.

  13. You run marathons for speed work.

  14. You can pee on the trail... standing up.

  15. You make a mean boiled pierogie.

  16. You ask Santa for gifts from UltraFit.

  17. You use sun block as skin moisturizer.

  18. You would rather run than argue.

  19. Your doggie drinks out of your running bottle.

  20. You''ve taught your daughter a few good uses for duct tape.

  21. You get more phone calls at 5 AM than 5 PM.

  22. You launder your running shirts in your lingerie bag.

  23. You don''t think twice about eating food you''ve picked up off the floor.

  24. You postpone your wedding because it will interfere with your training.

  25. You ran a 100-miler and found another use for your Lamaze breathing.

  26. You polish your toes when you lose the nail.

  27. You meet a man at a trail race and the topic of conversation is the color of your pee.

  28. Your cosmetics are organized into different sized zip-lock bags.

  29. You don''t even look for porta-potties anymore.

  30. You own a Swiss army knife and you know how to use it.

  31. You wear your trail shoes into the house.

  32. You have scabs on your pretty little knees.

  33. Your pedicure kit includes a pair of pliers.

  34. When you meet the opposite sex, you see:

    • ... a possible crew

    • ... a possible pacer

    • ... a possible search and rescue team

    • ... a possible source of race entry fees

  35. You believe there''s no “men''s room” or “ladies'' room” out on the trail.

  36. You track more mud in the house than your kids do.

And you know you''re an UltraLadiesMan if... your running hero is Ann Trason !


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